The Best Christmas Pageant Ever! The Musical Content Advisory

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Language

• In the song, “The Horrible Herdmans,” there are lyrics like “put worms in your sandwich”, “ants in your purse”, “rottenest kids”, “they hit and they steal and smoke smelly cigars, they ought-a be arrested and out behind bars”, “they’ll find you and pound you til your face is black and blue”, “they spit and cuss. They jab you with pencils, throw mud on your dress”, and “they’re a natural disaster! A plague! A stampeding herd!”

• Grace calls the Herdmans a “menace.”

• Leroy calls Charlie a “loser.”

• The kids say that they will “end up dead” if they say they want to play a lead over the Herdmans in the play. 

• Alice says “Imogene told me she was playing Mary and if I even opened my mouth, she would get a pussy willow and jam it so far into my ear it’d come out the other side.”

• The Herdmans make a fart noise during “Silent Night.”

• Alice says that Gladys “took three sips of communion wine” even though it was grape juice.

• When learning about the story of Jesus’ birth, Imogene asks “What kind of cheapo king gives oil for a present?” She also asks if “they would kill a baby” when she learns that King Herod was worried that Jesus would take over. 

• There is a song titled “Die Herod, Die!” 

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Themes and Situations

• The themes of The Best Christmas Pageant Ever: the Musical are challenging traditions, community, family, tolerance, and the true meaning of Christmas.

• There are situations where a whole chorus of people sing about how terrible the Herdman family is.

• There are situations where the Herdmans use coercement to get what they want.

• There are situations where an entire community is prejudiced and does not want to let kids into the Christmas show.

• There are situations where friends fight over the pageant and turn on each other.

• There are situations of clear wealth differences in families.

• There are situations where social workers are brought up.

• There are situations where prejudices lead to the pageant being shut down. 

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Potential Scary Moments

• The Herdmans go through the lunchroom stealing everyone’s lunch and they surround the kids whose lunch they want to steal. 

• When the Herdmans show up at Sunday school, Ralph and Leroy trip Teddy and Imogene pushes and holds Alice’s hands behind her back. 

• During the song “Die Herod, Die”, the Herdman’s make Charlie play Herod and they tie him up.

• Imogene accidentally sets fire to the church with a cigar.

• Flashing lights and theatrical fog/haze will be used in this production.